Thankfulness

Yesterday we celebrated another Thanksgiving.  Just five days prior I celebrated my 12th wedding anniversary.  When I look at how things have changed and rearranged and changed again, I can't help but to be thankful for everything that has happened to me.

When my husband and I first married, we were two struggling grad school students.  Within a year we were on our way to our journey in parenthood. Several years later, we added to that journey.  In between, we had career changes, lost several family members, witnessed serious illness in close family members, and generally experienced life.

Fast forward several more years.  Add in temporary unemployment, a relocation, growing children, and new beginnings.

Enter this year.  From frustrations to triumphs, all things have made me realize how fortunate I am and how thankful I should be:
 
My family is healthy. 
My husband and I are both employed. 
We have been given a chance to positively impact children outside of our family, church, and my job as a teacher. 
My husband has embraced his faith more than ever before and the changes in him have made positive things occur in our household.  His faith has impacted my faith and trickled to the children.
We have friends who love us unconditionally, and in turn, we feel the same about them.

There is nothing else I need right now.

I am simply thankful.

Promises

Promise: a sign that gives reason for expecting success.

I've been thinking about God's promises lately.  I have been in this place where I am not sure that I want to continue teaching.  Don't get me wrong; I love being with the children and teaching and learning right along with them.  I've been doing this for 10 years now. 

I'm not sure I want to deal with all of the bureaucratic changes that keep occurring in the field of education.  Furthermore, I am looking at my own two children and seeing the effects that some of these changes have had on them.  Not that my children are suffering academically, but I feel that they could be challenged more, that they need to be able to explore more, that they need to be able to grow into their own academically.  Both of my children are considered to be above grade level, and both of them have been part of gifted enrichment programs at their schools. 

But what does that mean, exactly?  Working in two different districts, in two different states, has shown me the inconsistency between states regarding children's education.  Some of the things I used to teach my students in my former district are considered to be enrichment or even "gifted" in my current district.  When I teach my current class, I still teach them from some of the same standards and with some of the same practices I used in my former district.  I know my students are learning.  But more and more, I see us teachers being pushed to teach to the test, standards checklists for mastery being cut back, new programs that dumb down the curriculum further and further, and adjustments in old programs that aren't helping anyone.

I am concerned for my children's academics.

I have been kicking around the idea of homeschooling my children for several months now.  Actually, since last school year when I saw how much my oldest was beginning to struggle.  Looking at her curriculum and what she was doing each week just showed more of the same.  More test practice, more memorization, less applied thinking for higher-level concepts, and less of a focus on the basics (like learning how to take proper notes).

Did I say I was concerned for my children's academics?

After many discussions with my husband, who agrees with the idea, we decided to pray about it.  I really feel that I should be homeschooling my two.  During my search for confirmation, I came across the following:

Romans 8:32 "He who did not spare His own Son, but gave Him up for us all--how will He not also, along with Him, graciously give us all things?" (This while reading through a 'mom blog' on Thursday.)
Psalms 37:4 "Delight yourself in the Lord; and He will give you the desires of your heart." (This was in my morning devotional yesterday.) 
John 15:7 "If you remain in Me and My words remain in you, ask whatever you wish and it will be given you." (That was in this morning's sermon at church.) 

When God tried to make a point, He makes a point!  These verses are coupled with my pastor's series of sermons on being open and available to God in everything, including prayer and praise.

My desire to is to be able to work from home so I can homeschool my children and prepare them for their futures with God's guidance and direction.  In His grace, that will happen if it is in His will and I stay in His word.

I will stand on His promises.

The Crazy Came...and Went

Wow.  It has been one heck of a time in my household.  We've gotten into the swing of the school stuff (at least, I'm pretty sure we have) and were cruising along quite nicely.

Then my husband had to go away for training for his job. In Des Moines, Iowa (which is several states away from where I live). For a WEEK.

For those of you who have spouses that travel on a regular basis, more power to you.  I extol your virtues.  I had no virtues last week; my week was crazed.  And as an aside, I don't know how single parents do it, either.  Six days was enough for me.

My husband left on a Sunday morning before church and returned very late Friday evening.  The house wasn't the same without him.  We had to adjust our daily routines a bit; my mother-in-law was here at the house to make sure my daughter got off the bus okay and didn't have to wait in an empty house until I got home. (My husband is usually home when she gets home.) Call me paranoid, but things happen.

During the week, I'll admit, I was tired.  Mainly because I wasn't sleeping well.  I was paranoid that someone would try to break in so I put strings of bells on all of my doors and added to my fervent prayers for safety and protection each night.  (Not that I live in a dangerous neighborhood; in fact it's pretty quiet. It's just that, well, things happen.)  I used to put bells on the doors when the kids were little to alert me to any "wandering" that might occur.  That helped ease my mind a bit.  Besides that, the kids wanted to sleep with me in my room.  We did that last time my husband went out of town (four years ago!).  But in all, the kids slept well. Me, not so much.  Between listening for the bells and extracting little legs, arms, and feet from various points on my body each night then teaching my class of 19 during the day, I was wiped out by the time Friday rolled around.

I hadn't realized just how much I depend on my husband for the daily workings of the house.  We have the household chores pretty well divided and it was a bit overwhelming to try and do them all during the week in between homework, grading papers, instrument practice, etc.  The kids helped out where they could, but they had their own chores to do.  I think we did a pretty good job, but truth be told, I'm glad to have my own chore list back.  I can say the experience has made me appreciate my husband more.

The experience was also a bit humbling for me.  I'm so used to what I perceive to be all of the "stuff" I need to do for my household.  You know, or else it will fall apart without me--despite the contributions everyone else makes to said household.  Ahh, yes.  The good ol' Supermom Complex.  I think God knocked me down a few pegs to help me see that I'm not as "super" as I might have thought I was.

I'm getting back into the groove of things.  We all are.  The crazy is gone, I learned about myself, and my husband is back.

Life is good.

Tomorrow

Well, here I am.  On the verge.  Of preparing for the next school year.  I know, I know.  I. JUST. ENDED. A. SCHOOL. YEAR! AND summer training!  BUT!  I know that if I don't begin, August (and the first day of the new school year) will be here before I know it.  SO...I've decided to do a bit at a time so I can still maximize my summer and enjoy my children (who are outside with the neighborhood children running themselves silly in an impromptu game of whiffle ball in our backyard).  I'm watching through the window and listening to the cheers.  Major Leagues, here they come! 

I really do try not to work while they are with me.  I try to do stuff before they get up or after they go to bed or when they are playing with their friends.  It doesn't always happen, especially when I'm lesson planning or researching on the computer for something, but I TRY.  That way, my time with them is MY time with them.  Like tomorrow.  I know I said I'll start school stuff, but I'm going to take some time and take them to Infinito's Pizza for lunch with their friend (My kids LOVE it there!).  Then we're going for Rita's Water Ice.  I can do school stuff while they sleep.  Although, I can say, sometimes they actually want to help with what I'm doing, especially if they see the craft bin appear.  I don't mind, but I don't want anyone thinking I'm forcing child labor here. 

Anyhow, tomorrow's the day.  The day that begins my slow descent back into school-planning mode.  Two months before the first day (August 30 for students; teachers are in a few days prior).  I can say, however, that I have a head start.  By the end of the school year, I have a pretty good idea of what needs to be done for the next school year. (I keep a running list on a tablet in my desk, so by the end of the year, my "To-Do" is already there.) I already have my room planned out.  I already know what I need to replace or get to enrich my classroom.  I'm not changing schools or grades next year, so I already know the curriculum. 

I do need to add some things in because our district went to a Learning Focused Schools model and we've been phasing in the subject models, one a year.  If you're not familiar with LFS, it's a compilation of Best Practices that uses Essential Questions (learning objectives), graphic organizers, vocabulary cards, student collaboration, summarization, etc.,  in every lesson for student enrichment and teaching.  My school has phased in the Language Arts and Math models.  This year we are supposed to add in the models for Science and Social Studies, which means I need to work on my unit overviews and vocabulary for those subjects.  Now it's just a matter of getting it all and organizing for the fall.

Which brings me back to tomorrow.  That's when it's all supposed to begin.  Bit by bit.  We'll see how long it takes me.